Four and a half months this time

The longest ever

Devoid of love and hope

Siding with the evil one

Avoiding calls from family and friends

Words making no difference

Just TV for hours and days

Sleepless, drugged

Family afraid and full of contempt—

All kinds of weird imaginings:

The loss of job and manhood

Loss of house and home

A shelter in Paterson

Wife and daughter attacked

Unable to defend

Children never educated

Wife succumbing to cancer

Daughter dying as well—

All because of your failure

Breakdown number four

The burnt out inner-city high school teacher, poet, singer, kung fu man—

All erased

A zero, nothing man with a dead dick

Afraid to leave the house—

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